AMMU's meanings

 I wish I could open about every aspect of mylife I wish you could know about my happiness I wish I could complain to you and whine my heartfull I wish I could discuss my discomfort I wish we aren't like this I wish I am not like this I wish you see things through my eye I wish I knew about discomfort of your shoe I wish I don't hide about something this important in my life I wish I could also openly joke about everything Why do everyone expect me have a say in my matters Why my situation is an open opinion poll for evryone except me Why......why......

 Why do everything I love is always far away and our of reach for me and I am always not eligible for anything I wish for.....I wanna end this....such a cursed fate I have ......loving something is always a bad thing ....I guess I have done a terrible mistake to suffer through all these,hope I can go back and undo all my wrong doings.....please god give me a chance to correct me.... please let me know why I am at mistake, where I am at mistake....I just wanna give up on everything

 The emotion which I refuse to take....and I don't want anyone to pity my loved ones ....I hate it when some pities me.....plzzz I don't wanna listen to pity in my life

Why does it effects you.....you weren't there with me at that time but everytime you holds me accountable for it....I don't wanna explain myself......why every one need explanation to understand my affection towards them  Why can't they search my face for a possible answer and could find it.....I can't explain you everytime you think about it If it goes on ....I doubt your love for me .....if I had been any further you would have treated me like a sinner .....like air in your life..... I don't need you if this still effects you

 Why every action of mine need to be paid with a part of my soul which I don't wanna afford Why do I need to explain ......why can't something be unconditional ...... Why do I have to face the consequences everytime ......why..... Why no one belives me....why do I need to explain  myself ..........can't i find some love without conditions...... ....without doubts .....true to myself......

Even knowing the reality of this world I still wanted to stay in my imaginary bubble  but someday it has to be broken  The one I am trying to do is destined to be a no , no mattet how much I tried I can never  It's hurts so much just to digest the reality that I can never be your proud daughter how many efforts I invest into it, one day I am just not part of you  I promise I will never make you suffer for now on even if has to take me to path of death